Wednesday, November 17
Insight into illness and injury
While Mary was massaging my legs and feet, the following insight arose.
I saw a lifelong pattern: being sick or injured is the way to get more loving attention. Illness and injury caused the parents to be concerned and treat me better -- and it kept Beth at bay, too. I saw how far back this goes: late adolescence, back to school days, even back into infancy. Being sick means getting love, nurturing, attention.
Injuries, illnesses... feigned or exaggerated illnesses... self-harming...
If you're sick, you get to stay home (where it's safe and nice.)
If you're ill, no one can ask anything of you.
If you're hurt, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. You can just curl up on the couch and relax and watch TV and read. The mommy will wait on you and bring you whatever you ask for...