Monday, March 29
Sat for about 45 minutes. Hard to get the flow of metta started at first. Usually that delightful warm glow is just right there, right away, but today there was a blank spot in the heart center, even a little pain. First tried me, then Sakula, then Daeja. Blank, blank, blank. Then when I directed metta to Gini, there was an upwelling feeling: tears filled my eyes behind closed lids. Bingo. There was a band of tightness constricting the heart, and gently chipping away at it with metta for Gini, the blockage began to dissipate somewhat. Some warmth, some loosening.
It's not all gone, though. The stress of this past weekend left marks. I fear for her safety, for her health. I worry.